How was I to know?
In my quiet time late December 2009, is when the Lord revealed to me His Will and Purpose; a new season for my life.
I’d been praying concerns to avoid the chances of an unrewarding existence; that each day, and the passing years just can’t be identical reflections of this life’s reality moving forward.
I didn’t want 2010 to be a turn of the page from 2009, and even though I was a novice to the Bible, somehow (Habakkuk 2:2,3) flashed in my brain; it reads – Then the Lord said to me, Write down this vision and make it plain so that he who reads it can run with it, because visions have to wait for their appointed time to testify; — but this still didn’t ring a bell to me.
That’s the beautiful thing about the Bible, I’ve read it, but as a History book which was of my former understanding; in addition to my ignorance, but truly not as the word of God, nonetheless mind you, it did record, and catalog.
God reminded me of a talent I have that I was using the wrong way; the talent was storytelling, and from now on, realize my storytelling was a gift from Him; a gift I was abusing by writing stories and illustrations that was not of Him, but for the satisfaction of lust that fuels the world. OUCH!!!!!!!
God said, Take My Word, and put illustration to it as the storyteller you are. My first reaction — Excuse me Lord!!!
Immediately I knew God had picked the wrong person choosing me, but how can you refuse God, how can you tell God no; then the story of Jonah being swallowed by a great fish came to mine when Jonah told God no – (Jonah 1:2,3), and (Jonah 1:17).
He next said, write as He reveals, and not of my own understanding. Overtime I wrote about the Promises of God; when finished I realized it was only an apprenticeship.
I then began to write about: awareness and understanding, and about the confusion I was having after morning prayer, and the battle of freewill, and the let downs of life and how to fix them, and how God chooses people; don’t let me leave out the phonies. I wrote about being called, and my existence, and people hurrying away from God, and the myth behind great men, and the more I wrote, the more I saw the topics I was writing about had a theme, that led me to this.
“How was I to know?”
Thank you Jesus. “How was I to know?” How was I to know that doing obedience would have Your book be Amazon’s #1 rated 45-minute new release in Religion & Spirituality, Self-Help, and Young Adult Short Reads? How was I to know the next notch is best seller? How was I to know that I’m now in the starting gate of my new birth walk after so many years? ,,,,, What’s that Lord?? ….. You say if I knew, it wouldn’t be called Faith, because faith is the reality of things hoped for, and the evidence of things not seen – (Hebrews 11:1). Are You saying it’s for certain, but not yet, and a fact it will become, but not right now Lord; too, it’ll be according to my faith, if it will be at all?
Are You saying Lord, because I never gave up hope, this day would come; that You knew all along when I was created, and stepped into time Your Will and Purpose for me would be established at this date, it’s just that I couldn’t see it, or possibly know that I was destined to do, and be obedient to this call; leaving the rest to You?
Glory be to God. What a mighty Lord I serve.
Gaidi